Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Windy Cities and Dinner Plates


So tomorrow is Thanksgiving. And whereas I'm exciting to spend the day with my family and being engrossed in our insanity, but on the other hand working in retail and having to deal with Black Friday kind of puts a damper on the holiday. It's like everyone else gets to go out and have a great long weekend, but for those of us enslaved to corporate clothing and electronic stores its the day from hell. I don't care what any manager says, working the day after Thanksgiving is worse than getting a root canal.

I've been having an issue with moods lately. One minute I want to be around people and be social, and then ten minutes later I've turned my phone off and curled up in bed to read. I don't think I'm depressed and I know being slightly anti-social is one of the things I'm known for....but it's starting to get on my nerves.

Maybe part of it is my deep want for someone to rely on. Yes, yes I love my friends and my family is wonderful blah, blah, blah. But how nice would it be to know there was a name in your phone that no matter what was going on would pick up and genuinely listen.

Somehow I always end up talking about my love life....or lack thereof. It's not that I'm lonely, I'm moderately happy with the way things are. That isn't to say that I wouldn't mind if something changed. I feel like I'm on the edge of something. I don't know if it's bad or good, but I can almost feel it. I just wish someone would tell me that its ok to jump, or its ok to step back.