The Rantings of a Lunatic At Sea

Here are three of my favorite poems.

Wine comes in at the mouth
And love comes in at the eye;
That's all we shall know for the truth
Before we grow old and die.
I lift the glass to my mouth,
I look at you and I sigh.
"A Drinking Song" by W.B Yeats.


I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead,
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)
~"Mad Girls Love Song" By Silvia Plath



Ever been kidnapped
by a poet
if i were a poet
i'd kidnap you
put you in my phrases and meter

You to jones beach
or maybe coney island
or maybe just to my house
lyric you in lilacs
dash you in the rain
blend into the beach
to complement my see

Play the lyre for you
ode you with my love song
anything to win you
wrap you in the red Black green
show you off to mama
yeah if i were a poet i'd kid
nap you
~"Kidnap Poem" By Nikki Giovanni"

Dancing down the cobblestones

I'm sitting in the library at 8:30 in the morning. I'm contemplating going to purchase some coffee. Apparently the library is updating its furniture. *Nothing in the world would help update this library that looks as if it just came off of a Bob Newheart shoot*

I keep thinking about where I was a year ago. I keep thinking about how much can chang in a year. And I keep thinking about how I swore I was going to stay the same person forever. What I mean by that is, I swore I was never going to get any better; I swore I was going to stay in the same "rut" for the rest of my life. Locked up in that little apartment watching sad....sad movies all by myself eating cereal and juice and coffee forever. Occassionally going to class, but even then if I went to campus I would still leave in the middle of the day to wander around Little Rock. And then at night, I would drive around town listening to music too loud until I was too tired to drive. I would go through cycles of wanting to talk to someone so badly that I would call practically everyone in my phone, to not answering my phone for days.

Yeah, I knew I was slightly crazy. But I was alright with it because I didn't know how to be any other way. And because I didn't know how to be any other way, I honestly didn't think I was ever going to get any better. But time does pass, even when you think its the most unlikely thing to ever happen, and each ticking of a second feels like the passing of a day. Time does pass, and time does heal. As horribly cliche as that sounds.

And now, I am exactly where I want to be. I would not say that everything is perfect, because no one's life is perfect. And if someone is saying that, they're lying. But I'm where I want to be. I have a job I like, I'm living exactly where I want to live. I have the most amazing friends I've ever had. I might not get to see them as much as I'd want, but its ok. And the part that I'm most alright with, is the fact that everything is not alright. I would be scared if everything was perfect, if my life was completely in line. I like the fact that I have to struggle, that I have to fight.

I had it great and perfect for a while, and then my world exploded. Great and perfect? Its not all its cracked up to be.